The Art of Delegation – Redefined

I have stopped watching news but the Indian in me still instigates me to scroll through news.google.com atleast once a day and that’s how I keep myself aware of the current affairs though I am under no delusion that I am enhancing my knowledge by reading this stuff as it is as shitty (if not more) than Ekta Kapoor’s TV soaps. Anyway, the point is that I intentionally or unintentionally get to know about some random stuff from these news feed, things such as Aamir Khan’s statement, Kejriwal’s office raids, other statements on intolerance and stuff. What I find most amusing is that people just leave their own work and start defending / supporting the party they like, which eventually leave them with titles such as AAPtards and Modi Bhakts.

And I wonder how these political parties are getting their work done by us.  Basically they just do something and leave the remaining battle to be contested between people who have no business whatsoever in this. I mean what will anyone gain by posting something derogatory about Kejriwal or Modi or even Lalu Yadav. Chalo, even if you do a great job of finding some facts about AK having said something in the past which he is contradicting, how are you helping anyone or even yourself?

Media or should I say manhoosiyat, looks like is the manager working for the political parties whose job is only to pass on daily topics to us. Just compare it with an IT company, the senior management decides on some project, managers are told to pass on directions to the software engineers (SEs) and SEs then just work on that job. The only difference here is that the SEs ARE NOT GETTING PAID FOR IT. Senior management is getting their work done for free..!! and we Indians who pride themselves in being a very intelligent race is being played openly.

This is a simple request to all my friends to please stop sharing; posting anything about Kejriwal, Modi, and the likes (RaGa is and will always be an exception). Even if you are proved right in the end, there are no prizes for guessing the right answer here.

Media – The Game Changer or The Game Destroyer

There was a time in last year, before the general elections, and before our very own Modiji finally became the Prime Minister of the country, that I used to have dreams about political discussions and imagine myself sitting in one of those chairs in Times Now studios and ridiculing INC leaders and anybody questioning our dearest Modiji. Obviously I was naïve and stupid at that time and I laugh at my actions now but I realized one very important thing – that media, over the years, has transformed so much and in so many different ways. From being just a newspaper, which was to be read in the morning, discussed in the afternoon, and forgotten by night; it has now become life for some people. I am sure these people also have dreams like I used to have, about meat ban, beef ban, minority rights etc. etc.

While there is no denying the role media, esp. the news channels and social media, have played in highlighting some really important issues and creating mass movements in getting justice, either through courts or through social trials and making caste based politics a little less relevant, but I get a feeling that from being just a medium, it has taken a life of its own and become all too powerful, dominating people’s lives and passing judgments on its whims. It is like one of those numerous examples from Indian history, where some people were made heros and once they got there, they started pulling down the very people who helped them become heros.

One would argue that media’s job is to report facts and put forth all the possible point of views which they are perhaps doing. So what’s the problem! But from where I see it, I only see their endeavours in polarizing the society. Modi supporters vs. non-modi supporters, jains vs. non-jains, beef eaters vs. non-beef eaters, dhoni supporters vs. dhoni bashers. The list is never ending.

Now these discussions / debates are not mere places where people put forth their point of views but they become battle grounds where you a) have to choose sides and b) have to defend your point of view till your last breadth. Typically they start with a statement / ban against xyz community / group / fan followers. Now people from xyz will start making defensive statements for no reasons just to prove that they are not on the wrong side (there could be some stupid people who got inspired by the great Ornab and went and personally insulted our guy from xyz). But whatever might be the case, now people from all across will take it upon themselves to prove that xyz is all wrong and might even quote an example from history which dates back to 1800s to prove that people from xyz have a history of doing such things. Now does anyone really care about that era anymore and does anyone really believe that we now have any personality trait which matches with the people of our group back in the day. There are some random people who are invited as panelists on these news channels and they with zero credentials of their own, would slander / pass judgments under the cloak of their opinion. One example which I distinctly remember is when Shobha De had come for a discussion on Arushi Murder and had almost pronounced the parents as murderers as she see didn’t feel any grief in Nupur Talwar’s voice and also didn’t see her crying!!!

Ultimately it’s the GOD, the messiah, shri shri shri Ornab Goswami who prevails and has the final word! But people at times tend to continue these discussions at home/office/other social places. I was also guilty of this till last year when I thought that the God himself has entrusted me with the responsibility of making everyone around me aware of the goods that Modiji will do to this nation J

I obviously don’t think that one shouldn’t have a point of view. I’d be undemocratic if I say that but I guess it’d be helpful if we do an internal analysis and decide whether the issue really requires a point of view or whether it can be conveniently ignored. Whether a Sheena Bora or a meat ban or a beef ban really makes a difference in my life. Whether I personally have had a problem with a person of xyz group / religion / community / caste in my life or I am just getting swayed by what the media is reporting. Sometimes it is just a stray incident which media projects as xyz vs abc group clash because they are short of breaking news and we get polarized for no reason.

The media obviously is under the high of being the hero and it is upon us to make it realize its true place – that we will hear you only if you make sense! We will endorse you only if you show both positive and negative news and don’t make our lives unnecessarily more miserable than it really is!!

Aarushi Talwar Case - This can happen to anyone!

I know posting views and opinions on facebook is not the “Correct” thing to do these days and I also know that many people try to settle personal vendetta through this medium but unfortunately I am just not able to restrain myself from posting my feelings on this particular topic. It is about Rajesh and Nupur Talwar who were convicted for the murder of their only daughter Aarushi Talwar in 2013.

I would request all the readers of this post not to compare this with the news making round these days. I know nothing about the Indrani case and I strongly believe that these two cases are entirely different.

The trigger for this post is a book I recently read – Aarushi by Avirook Sen. The book talks about the Talwar family and the horrific incident which happened on 16^th May 2008, the rumors which were intentionally or unintentionally spread in the media reg. the Talwars indulging in wife swapping, they having a very rich background etc., the investigation of the case and last but not the least, the Trial which gave a “Guilty” verdict to the parents. Now there are many things which I started acknowledging while reading this book. 

1.   The stereotypes that exist in our society with respect to young boys and girls studying in English medium schools. That they start indulging in sexual activities pretty early in life and the speed at which they are advancing; perhaps the time is not far when we might say that even 8 – 9 year olds might be doing it. Also the fact that since one or two MMS cases have come to the foray, courtesy some psycho kids, we have started assuming that all kids who go to good schools and converse in English and esp. good looking girls, do it.

2.       Our craving for sensationalism doesn’t know any limits. We are ready to believe just about anything as long as it is interesting to hear / discuss. And media is more than happy in accentuating this craving to get better TRPs. Without doing the slightest due diligence, these idiots happily and unapologetically declare people guilty.

3.       The high regard we hold for judiciary and CBI. We generally think that it is the politician who the villains and our judiciary is the pillar which has kept the country strong and that CBI is better than the Police. Well the truth is that the selection criteria for CBI is no different from police services and that both are IPS officers, just that they happen to get a different department at the time of posting. Judges – well if they were that great, we wouldn’t have some of the open and shut cases go the way the have – Bhai, amma, lallu (the list is never ending).

Coming back to the book, It is obviously biased towards the Talwars. The author clearly believes that the Talwars didn’t do it and that perhaps three servants who used to work in some nearby houses might be involved (which was also the view of the CBI’s first investigating officer) but the interesting part is that this part never made it to the news because obviously there was way too much sensationalism in painting the Talwars with the red paint. The combination of a young girl indulging in sex + Rich Parents with no morals + honor killing of the daughter was a ready made TRP story and who would want to miss it.

When I started reading the book, I got stuck with a couple of key points:

1.       A girl who is not even 14 years old having an affair with a house servant who was 45 years old sounded simply blasphemous. The girl (Aarushi) had to have a mental problem if that was true. But that wasn’t the case as has been testified by her friends even after all this was over.

2.       Aarushi was Talwars’ only daughter and she too had come very late into their lives. Killing her just to protect their family’s honor again was something that I was not able to digest and mind it, this is not a case of khap panchayat. We are talking about two dentists who had a lover marriage.

3.       After the closure report in which the CBI themselves claimed that they have not found any evidence to make a case against anyone, what evidence did they find which helped them win a conviction.

After reading this book, I was completely convinced that the parents didn’t do it. It was a botched up investigation where the CBI, perhaps, wanted to prove that they can also solve a case, in which a high-profile family was involved (only a rumor spread by the media coz if they really had been high profile, they wouldn’t be in the prison right now). There are multiple evidences as cited by the book which clearly prove that the Talwars were simply framed and by the end of it, I also believed it.

Now the most provoking thought that I had was, what if it’d been my family instead of Talwars! We could also have been shown as living in a posh residential society, in a house which is worth millions, as people who frequent the pubs / restaurants regularly and live a lavish life and that we deserve to be punished. What can you do if something like this really happens to you! I was literally in tears when I read the excerpts towards the end of the book from Rajesh Talwar’s diary which he is writing in the prison and was wondering what did they do to deserve this (if they really didn’t kill Aarushi).

I would request each one of you who has come this far in reading this long post to please read this book (I am not getting any commission from the author / publisher) but I really want as many people as possible to read it so that the news which has been fed to us by the media can be washed away. I don’t know what I can do to help the family but I would be more than happy to do whatever I can. I also have a copy of the book in Delhi and if anyone wants to read that one, please ping me.

The new bullies of Delhi Metro

I have recently moved back to Delhi and travel by metro extensively. Not a great experience but considering the time, energy (which otherwise would have expended in driving) and money (courtesy my sindhi roots) it saves, I have embraced it with both hands!

But what is most interesting to me are the Bullies I see almost every day. Now one would think that what can possible be so interesting about bullies as they are almost everywhere in Delhi-NCR. But these not the bodybuilder types, they are the 50-60 age people who pretend to be senior citizens and believe that its their birthright to sit not just on the seats reserved for senior citizens but also the seats where it says "please give this seat to the one who needs it more than you do". Now here is the question - would a young guy who had been standing for more than an hour need this seat more or the 50+ person who has just entered the metro? I have politely asked a few guys to produce their id cards so that I can find out whether they really are sr. citizen or only pretend to be one and have got very rude response, which i couldn't understand. Isn't it my right to check before i vacate the seat coz if he isn't that old then perhaps both of us have equal right on that seat?

The other category of bullies are the females! Now before you start dialing National commission of women cell, please read a few more lines about what I have to say. The females I am talking about are the ones who wouldn't go to the coach reserved for them but would get into any of the other coaches because they know that they can get any seat vacated by the male citizens of the country unless ofcourse they are very very old. So they blatantly would ask for the seats which are marked for more needy ones. Again the same question - would a female who has just entered the metro need this seat more or the guy who had been standing for over an hour.

And the most interesting aspect of this is that the bystanders also support the females and the guys pretending to be senior citizens although they have no business mediating in between!! Now I know many would think that I shouldn't be saying this about the females as its not easy being one in a city like delhi, but what about the guys who dont do anything to females. Isn't it absolutely unfair to them that the 50% seats they are allowed to sit on are also not always available to them while they constitute roughly 80% of all the travelers!!

Anyway, I personally enjoy giving it back to these bullies and help others also who are getting bullied and its my sincere hope that more people realize that sympathy shouldn't come only on the basis of age / sex but based on the merit of each case.!!

SRK - The Rajnikanth of Bollywood

I just read an article on google news about SRK and Kajol's upcoming movie called dilwale. The title read 'Can Shah Rukh Khan and Kajol recreate majic?' and my first thought was 'are you kidding me?' Shahrukh khan is pushing 49 old and Kajol is turning 40 this year and we are still asking this question. Have we completely lost it, who wants to see a love story of a 49 years old guy and a 40 years old lady. Istn't it insane!! Amitabh is like 23 years older than SRK but dont forget that he started playing an old man 15 years back with Mohabbaten. Well I am not saying that he is the benchmark and that SRK still has 6-7 years before he joins the papa league. But one thing that really comes out is the psyche of the audience who are willing to pay (a hefty amount) to watch a love story of these guys, which aint too different from the guys who go for a Rajnikanth movie, where is romancing a 28 years old Sonakshi Sinha. I immediately draw a parallel with Sachin in cricket or any other old politician in the country which are the other two popular subjects in the country after movies.

What I realize is that we tend to stick with the people we have seen during the time when these activities peaked. Now Sachin really scored a lot of runs, but does that mean no one else will score as many runs ? wouldn't that'd be foolish! Rohit Sharma has already scored a couple of double hundreds. But we still want to hang on to Sachin, the same way we want to hang on to SRK or Rajnikanth. Why can't we let it go? Why can't we say that we are not interested in watching a 49 year old romance a 40 year old and that we would like some freshness and tell the producers to think of something different if they really want to cast these actors.

My father always tells me that old songs are still the best and that newer songs (after 90s) will never be as famous and my thought process is that people have generally excelled over time in every field then why not this one. Then I also think about some of the good songs which have come in my era. True their life is not as much as some of the old songs but that's not because they aren't good, but because more good songs came along the way. But my father has still hung on to the old songs and people like him make these songs ever green.

Anyway, the point here is that our ability to hang on to things which we like doesn't let us appreciate the newer and fresher things in life and in an era where the new generation is trying to disrupt every thought process, this approach might turn out to be very dangerous. I think it is high time that we start ignoring some of the old sayings such as 'Old is gold', assuming these were said in the era where people never imagined newer generations will evolve so much. Let us start making our own sayings such as 'Old is gold; but gold is a dead investment. I'd rather invest in a start up'

Marriage Registration Process in Mumbai

Marriage Registration in Mumbai

Marriage certificate is required wherever one need to prove that he/she is married including applying for dependent visa, reissue of passport after marriage, opening of joint account. Hence it is advisable to get this process done as early as possible.

We didn’t do it for 3 years after our marriage but when my passport expired and I applied for a re-issue and put my marital status as married I was told that I have to produce a marriage certificate as proof. Since we had shifted to Mumbai by then, we decided to undergo the process here in Mumbai although the marriage happened in Delhi. After having made 4-5 rounds to the marriage registrar office I thought of summarizing the process for the benefit of others.

Since we were staying in south Mumbai, we had to get it done from the Old Custom House, Shahid Bhagat Singh Marg, Ground Floor, Fort office. The other offices in Mumbai are

a.       Sub Registrar's Office (Bandra), Andheri & Borivaii Taluka, MHADA Building, Ground Floor, Kalanagar, Bandra (E), Mumbai 400 051.

b.      Sub Registrar's Office (Chembur) Kurla Taluka, R.C.V. Marg, Near Rationing Office, Administrative Buildings, Ground Floor, Chembur, Mumbai 400 071.

First thing first, you can get the marriage registered in Mumbai or any other place if one out of the three conditions is satisfied:

a.       Husband stays in the city

b.      Wife stays in the city

c.       Marriage was solemnized in the city

Documents required are

a.       Birth Certificate of husband and wife – best is to have School leaving certificate or Class 10^th certificate – original and 1 xerox (attested)

b.      Residence proof for bride and groom – advisable to have the same address on the address proof.  Although the rule says that either husband or wife can be in the city to register the marriage but you will have to do a lot of explaining if its different – original and 1 xerox copy (attested)

a.       A piece of advice – get Aadhaar card made wherever you are and then get the address changed to your Mumbai address. Changing Aadhaar card address can be done online and even credit card bill copy works for changing the address.

c.       2 photographs of both husband and wife.

d.      1 copy of the wedding card.

e.      3 witness id Xerox (attested) and 1 photograph each – required when going for the second time. Witnesses age should be such that they were atleast 21 years old at the time of marriage.

You will be required to make atleast 2 (3 if you go yourself to pick up the MC) trips to the office but if you know all the steps of the process, you can save a lot of time and effort.

Steps:

1.       Take the original and 1 Xerox copy each of birth certificate and residence proof. These need to be attested but if you can’t find a gazetted officer, there will be one guy sitting outside the office to attest documents.

2.       You are also required to put Rs 100 court fee stamp which can be purchased from outside of High court. That’s how I got it but if you are able to find a better source please use it. Also get two Rs 5 court fee stamps also – this is something no one tells you in the first visit that you will these stamps for the second visit.

3.       Take a form from the clerk at the registrar office – I don’t think this form is available online

4.       Fill up the form and affix Rs 100 court fee stamp, photograph etc.

5.       Get two Xerox copies of the filled up form

6.       The clerk will take the form to the officer who will check the original documents and will give you a date and time to come again with witnesses after a month.

7.       You will be asked to pay Rs 250 and will be given a receipt and one copy of the form

8.       On the stipulated date, you have to go with 3 witnesses. Ensure that their age is such that they were 21+ at the time of marriage.

9.       You have to take another form from the clerk and fill it up. Also fill up the witnesses’ details and affix their photograph on the form.

10.   Affix one Rs 5 court fee stamp on the new form and give all the forms to the clerk

11.   You will be called after they check everything and after that you just have to sign along with the witnesses and that’s it. You will have to pay another Rs 215 and will be issued another receipt for the same.

12.   You will be asked to bring both the receipts after 4-5 days to get the marriage certificate.

13.   Another advice – Since this certificate might be required at various places in life, you can get more copies if you want. Advisable to fill up a form for the same at that time only so that when you come the next time, you can collect all the copies together. The second Rs 5 court stamp will be required for this form. Rs 25 will be charged for each copy.

AAP report card

Its been close to a month that AAP has been in power and let us see what they've done so far:

1. First the good things, AAP started on a positive note, took decisions (providing free water and power subsidy) which although didn't make much economic sense but still i believe doing something is better than not doing anything. Having said that, it doesn't mean that you talk about 200 crore (total cost of providing power subsidy) as if its an insignificant amount. Anyways, good that you atleast delivered on your poll promise! I kind of agree with you when you say that no other party has ever done work this fast but then lets agree that when you took these decisions, you ass was on fire. You indeed were scared that INC might pull you down. But I still give you credit!
2. Removing VIP culture from Delhi. Really thanks for taking this up! though i've not been to delhi after you became the CM. But if this is really done, I thank you a million times.

Surprisingly these are the only points for which I can give any credit to AK/AAP. I have certain reservations on these as well but I'd like to start on a positive note so that i don't sound critical of AAP and hence a Modi agent.

Now we evaluate the not so good things/decisions taken by the AAP:
1. Providing shelters to the poor feeling the wrath of delhi cold. I believe its a very good step and AAP should definitely get credit for it. A state shouldn't let its citizens die in cold. But, do you realize that Delhi is already over crowded with people and your providing this kind of shelters will only make matters worse as more and more immigrants would now come to delhi. How long can you keep providing shelters to these people.
What could have been done: When taking this decision, if you could have clearly stated that no more people will be provided this kind of facility and if people are still found on the streets, they will be sent off to their respective villages.

2. Letting Autowallas have their way in saying no to commuters (see link). Although i agree that auto drivers aren't able to earn their livings due to several reasons but that doesn't mean that the commuters should suffer. Letting them say no to commuters and removing any check on them might lead to another Nirbhaya mishap. I hope you've not forgotten that one of the reasons for that incident was auto wallas saying no to taking her home. I think this was totally populist politics and infact vote bank politics since these auto wallas voted for you, now you'll agree to whatever they ask for.

3. Waiving off 10-months power bills by defaulters (see link). Now this is irrationality at its best; if the meters were indeed faulty, the power companies should be asked to waive off the bills and if not, please ask the people to pay the dues as they are the ones who have consumed that electricity. Why should you pay these dues by tax payers money. Reasoning all your subsidy decisions just by saying that you are not buying a helicopter is not acceptable.

4. Staging Dharna to protest against Delhi Police. I totally agree that Delhi Police is extremely bad in all aspect. But the way your minister just asked the Police officers to raid a house was really uncalled for, and the way you came and acted in his defense made you look very arrogant and atrocious atleast to me. I've lived most of my life in delhi, in one of the areas where these RWAs are there. I must tell everybody that these RWAs are no becharas as they have been made out to be. There is still no proof of drug trafficking/prostitution yet. And there was no FIR in place. I have already mentioned that just because the residents complain against somebody, it doesn't mean that the issue is right. I've seen instances where the RWAs have made some unlawful demands like stopping cops from writing challans within the colony because the residents want their minor kids to drive within the colony. Can that be justified?

5. FDI in retail. I don't know among this educated party is an economist who believes that FDI in retail will kill the local stores/traders because I find it hilarious. We have seen how FDI has come into various sectors and changed the dynamics of the game. Be it in retail (single brand) or telecom, customers have derived huge value from the growing competition. But looks like AAP has turned a blind eye toward this and is only worrying about the traders who had voted for them and would again vote for them in the lok sabha elections or state elections if INC pulls this govt down.

6. Still not doing anything on creating a separate security force (one of the key issues raised by AK before the elections), drafting lokpal bill (thought this was to be brought withing 15 days), taking actions against congress and Shiela D (again AK had said that he had given a 350 page evidence against SD) long back.

There are some more decisions which i highly criticize, but the point i want to drive here is that AAP after getting a great response in the delhi elections, for most part, are going the wrong way. Instead of working towards the betterment of delhi, it is only pleasing the poor (not different from INC policies) by providing rain baseras and subsidies, wasting precious time on lok sabha elections, dharnas, making stupid comments like referendum in J&K, and now saying that BJP, not congress is our main enemy. Boss enemy venemy chhoddo, bas kaam karo. If you do your work properly, people will give you a clear mandate to run the country, and all the states. But first you will have to prove yourself. Creating helpline and asking people to do sting operations will not do.

Well to sum it up, I can only say that AK and AAP's members are mostly sincere, hard working, and have good intentions and are doing something. I would really like them to run a full term in Delhi. But, they have a huge task in front of themselves of not shifting the focus from the Development of Delhi, restraining from the media and not get into an arrogance mode (AK's interview with Rajdeep was one of the most arrogant political interview i have seen till date). Unfortunately, I don't see that happening thus far and i feel sorry to say but the self destruct button has been pressed!